Nurturing a Lasting Marriage: Key Strategies

The secret to maintaining a marriage is mutual support and understanding. First, give each other private space and time, so that each other has the opportunity to be alone and pursue personal hobbies. Second, understand and meet each other's needs, including emotional and life support. In addition, it is also important to understand each other's love language in order to better express love. In general, maintaining a marriage requires both parties to work together to create a healthy, balanced and mutually supportive relationship.

1. Embrace and Support Each Other's "Me Time"

In the whirlwind of life, especially with children, finding time for oneself can seem like a luxury. However, it's precisely during these hectic times that prioritizing each other's solo time becomes crucial. Take, for instance, a couple I know with two young children. They've mastered the art of solo parenting, often seen taking turns to care for the kids while the other enjoys a few days of uninterrupted personal time. This not only allows each partner to indulge in activities they love but also helps them develop strong independent parenting skills, alleviating the constant exhaustion that comes with parenting.

Simple routines, like a day for golf for the husband or a day for yoga or shopping for the wife, can work wonders. This mutual understanding benefits both partners, recharging their batteries and infusing their relationship with renewed energy. Even without children, having designated "me time" is crucial. Marriage involves daily interaction, and without breaks, it's easy to feel overwhelmed or bored in the relationship.

2. Understanding and Meeting Each Other's Needs

Men, often perceived as straightforward, retain this trait even in marriage. The advantage here is that meeting one particular need can often keep them content. For example, a wife shared that her husband becomes noticeably irritable and argumentative if they go more than a week without intimacy. To prevent this, she ensures they have regular date nights, even if it means squeezing in time before work or other commitments.

Another wife shared how her husband places a high value on food. She makes sure to indulge his culinary desires on their dates, even if it means waiting in long queues for sought-after dishes. As long as her husband is delighted with the food, everything else falls into place.

Understanding and speaking each other's love languages play a crucial role in maintaining a healthy relationship. For instance, if one partner values physical touch but the other expresses love through acts of service, there might be a disconnect. Once they understand each other's love languages, it becomes easier to fulfill each other's needs and strengthen their bond.

In jest, I once told a single colleague that after marriage, one can no longer be a princess. Married individuals often share humorous stories about the "humble" experiences post-marriage or parenthood, joking about not being able to do what they want anymore. However, as long as both partners feel fulfilled in their roles and desires, being mutually dedicated to each other can be incredibly fulfilling.